I don’t know what to do with my life: What to do next

Whether you’re a new grad or contemplating a career change, the question will inevitably come up: “What should I do with my life?”

You aren't the first to stand at this crossroads, and you won't be the last. Everyone says “I don’t know what to do with my life” at some point. It's a universal problem to face — one that requires introspection, patience, and a bit of guidance to navigate. 

The journey to finding your purpose has always been a challenging one. It’ll have twists, turns, and detours. But these uncertainties aren't setbacks. They’re opportunities to grow. If you’re wondering what direction your life should take, here’s how to explore the options and find meaning.

Is it okay if you don’t know what to do with your life?

Not knowing what your life goals are is completely okay. It’s a daunting thought, but it’s also very common, and you’re not alone in feeling lost. 

When you learn about others’ achievements on LinkedIn or in conversation, it's easy to feel like you're lagging behind. But remember: each person has their timeline, and it's okay to feel unsure or to be in a rut. These feelings, although overwhelming, are a part of the human experience.

Life isn't a race, and comparing yourself to others can rob you of joy and cloud your vision. Instead, focus on your own pace, celebrate small victories, and understand that it's not only acceptable but completely natural to struggle to carve your own path, even if it means persevering through periods of doubt. 

Here’s evidence of just how normal feeling lost, and eventually finding success, can be:

• Around 75% of people age 25–33 have experienced a quarter-life crisis
• The average person will move 11.7 times during their life
• In 2022, people stayed at one job for an average of only 4.1 years
• Nearly 4 million people quit their jobs in September 2023 alone
• Almost 50% of older millennials say they wish they’d chosen a different career
• Many successful people found their purpose later in life, including Vera Wang, Julia Child, and Charles Darwin
• Over 30% of adults say they’re too stressed to even think about the future

Moving across the country, completely switching careers, or finding fulfillment in life later than expected is normal. It’s all part of the process of finding true happiness and discovering what you want to do.

I don't know what to do with my life: What next?

The Harvard Study of Adult Development, one of the world's most extended studies on adult life, tracked the lives of 268 Harvard sophomores and, subsequently, their offspring and other participants. It found that strong relationships were pivotal for well-being — more than wealth, IQ, or genetics. This study shows that if you’re feeling lost, focusing on community and relationships might have a stronger impact than trying to find meaning in your job or hobbies.

Emphasizing the value of relationships and building a supportive community is one of the most profound steps you can take toward a fulfilling, healthy, and long life. And when you connect with the people around you, you’ll have the support you need to uncover a path and start finding your purpose. As you navigate the tips below, remember to surround yourself with people who care for you — no matter what you decide to do.

Here are some steps to start figuring out what to do:

1. Acknowledge your feelings

The post-high school years or the tumultuous time after a career change at 40 can feel like you're lost in a maze. Instead of panicking and trying to find your way out right away, take a breath. You can’t discover the path if you’re constantly worried about what to do. 

Acknowledging and confronting your feelings can put you in a more productive headspace. Try speaking to a friend or coach to start verbalizing your experience. You could also journal to self-reflect on this time in your life, with questions like:

• What external pressures are making me feel this way?
• Is there a particular area of my life that feels the most untethered?
• What’s my biggest challenge, and what’s my biggest goal?

2. Fuel your curiosity

“I have no idea what to do with my life” can quickly transform into “I’m excited for the next step” when you reignite your innate curiosity. Try to remember how it felt when you were a child and someone asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up. Instead of focusing on the pressures of life, you focused on what you would enjoy doing — so enter that mindset.

Explore new areas of your life, whether that’s taking an art class or diving into a startup idea you’ve toyed with. When you think big, and do so with an open mind, you can unlock passions and paths you wouldn’t have otherwise considered.

3. Reflect on your values

For every action you take and belief you have, there's an underlying personal value. It could be the well-being of your family, a thirst for innovation, or a commitment to community service. 

Recognizing your core beliefs is an excellent exercise in introspection, but it's also a practical step. When you align your actions with your values, you're setting a clear path for the rest of your life and ensuring that the journey brings satisfaction and success. Find out what you believe, and then you can start to build the life you want around it.

4. Experiment with interests

The beauty of life is that there are unlimited opportunities. You could move to New York City, become a digital nomad, or start farming your own food. Truly, anything is possible — but that can make it hard to narrow down potential pathways.

When unsure which direction to head, start by exploring your interests. If web design has always intrigued you, try taking a short course. If the buzz around podcasts makes you curious, consider starting your own, even if it's part-time. Interests often appear as just hobbies or time-pass activities, but they're potential career paths, opportunities for self-improvement, and doors to parts of your life you might've never known existed.

5. Celebrate your uniqueness

In the entire span of human history, there's no one quite like you. Your life experiences, your hard work, the challenges you've faced — they've shaped you. And they've endowed you with a unique perspective. Reflecting on your strengths and experiences can boost your self-esteem and help you understand how you contribute to the world. 

What to do when you don't know what to do: 8 actionable tips

Thinking about what you might want in life is just the first step to finding your purpose. Taking action, setting goals, and crafting your life in an intentional way can put you on the path to greater satisfaction.

A study published in Frontiers in Psychology says that the practice of crafting a plan helps you take control of your life and find purpose. Also known as life crafting, this evidence-based technique encourages you to reflect on your intrinsic values and build a plan to match them. This can help you set goals that align with what you truly want — not what other people or society tells you. 

With that in mind, here are eight tips to help you find yourself and start crafting your life:

1. Assess areas of your life

Life is multifaceted, and so are your roles within it. Your job, family, hobbies, and even the small things you do every day — like walking the dog or reading a book before bed — can indicate what direction you might want to take.

Break down the things you love and don’t love about your current routines with self-discovery journal prompts or tools like the Wheel of Life®. This can help you see what your values are and decide what might need to change. The activities you gravitate toward might hold clues to future endeavors, while those you dread could guide you away from certain paths. If you find that reading before bed is your favorite part of the day, you could work something related to literature into your career or life purpose, surrounding yourself with stories you enjoy.

2. Journal your thoughts

“What am I supposed to do with my life?” is a valuable journal prompt. You turn abstract thoughts into tangible words when you transcribe feelings, aspirations, or frustrations onto paper. As you review these pages over time, you might identify recurring themes that highlight your passions or areas that need improvement.

Here are some self-discovery questions that could help you find purpose: 

• When do I feel most like myself?
• What’s my definition of success? Do I still agree with it?
• Are there any gaps in my learning?
• What job would I do for free?
• What legacy do I want to leave?
• What skills do I want to improve?
• What’s on my bucket list, and why?

3. Venture into hobbies

Hobbies aren't just distractions from the daily grind or ways to fill your free time. They can indicate what activities fulfill you and give you insight into how you prefer to spend your time. 

While not every interest needs to culminate in a full-time job, dabbling in activities like pottery, coding, or hiking can occasionally unearth a lucrative and satisfying career path. You can also find opportunities to pursue these interests outside of work, like dedicating your weekends to running a hiking group or starting a coding boot camp. Sometimes, even a few hours a week of fulfilling work is enough to feel like you’re fulfilling your purpose.

4. Scrutinize your career 

Reflect on your work history — the roles that challenged you, the internships that inspired you, or even that high school project that was oddly satisfying. Analyzing these moments can help discern which tasks invigorate you and sap your energy. If you find a pattern pointing toward a particular field or role, it might be worth considering a career change in that direction.

5. Take a sabbatical

Taking a year, or even six months, off from work or school could give you the space you need to seek new perspectives. And if your current job is burning you out, a sabbatical can give you a break and clear your mind.

Try traveling, volunteering, or even spending time at home with family to learn more about what you love to do. If your job doesn’t allow official sabbaticals and you can afford to not work for a while, a career break could offer similar insights.

6. Consume content on topics you love

Listening to motivational podcasts, reading self-help books, and even watching inspiring TED Talks could point you in the right direction to find your purpose. Create a reading list on topics that inspire you, like productivity or resilience, and set a goal to go through it within a few months or a year. You’ll feel like you’re accomplishing something, and you’ll learn more about yourself and the world.

7. Work with a coach

Being uncertain about what to do with your life is scary, and that’s especially true if you’re panicking about your path. If this is the case for you, working with a coach could offer the support you need to set clear goals and chart a course you feel confident about. 

A life coach won’t tell you what direction to take, but they will give you the tools you need to look inward and discover what you really want. They’ll work with you to reflect on what you care about and create clear action plans for change. Just keep in mind that if you think you’re facing a mental health challenge that’s keeping you from living the life you want, speaking to a mental health professional might also be a good step to take.

Embracing the journey to self-discovery

The feeling of being lost and thinking "I don’t know what to do with my life," is more common than you might think. It's not a sign of failure, but a step toward personal growth and understanding. Take this moment to acknowledge your feelings, embrace curiosity, and reflect on your unique strengths and values. 

Seeking your purpose isn't a singular destination — it’s an evolving journey. Remember that your path is distinct, and finding it takes time and self-reflection. There’s nothing wrong with making a career change at 50 or starting over across the country when you thought you’d always live in your hometown. Doing it now now is much better than starting later.

As you work toward uncovering your purpose, know that each question and every small victory is part of the journey. You're not alone in this, and with persistence, your direction will become clear. Keep moving forward, and trust in the process of self-discovery.